cuak dow!

tomorrow is going to be
the one and only,
the first and last,
final paper.

and
i have no idea why am i nervous to death at the moment.
it's annoying.

anyway,
wish me luck.

*talking to myself*

oh.fark! it's so lonely to be locked up in this small room, reading and studying this alone, with no sound but the rain.



smart student (macam haram),
nfhms.

it's there, before my eyes.

I saw it.
I saw the house.
I was speechless.

There was no sound that I could make.
But there were so many things running through my mind.

It was so beautiful. It looked so elegant.
Standing still on top of a hill, surrounded heavily by green trees and a wide view to serve the eyes.
It was so beautiful. It looked so expensive.

It struck my heart.
Not for the memories. Not for what I have missed.
Knowing who you are now, knowing who you were before.
I couldn’t help but think.
What a change have you went!
I couldn’t help but think.
Why didn't life treat you well?
I couldn’t help but think.
How are you actually doing?

Because I couldn’t imagine myself being in your shoes.

I feel sorry.
For sometimes I threw words
like I knew everything. like everything is so easy.
But having to look at it, I understand how hard it is.
how bad it is capable to hit you.
and why we could fight over these things.

It wasn’t easy. It wasn’t that simple.
Being so used to it and lose it in a blink of eye could make you insane.

It is traumatic. It is indeed unbearable.




p/s: please hang in there...



offering strength,
nfhms.

shit

shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.
shit.shit.shit.shit.


shit,
nfhms.

food galore!

yesterday was Saturday.
i mean, another Saturday.
what i'm trying to say is another Saturday left me. T.T

i had sleeping marathon.
damn! it was good.seriously! you should try.

last night, i woke up with an empty tummy. @.@
suddenly i have the urge to eat so many things.
grilled chichken chop, subway, tom yam, steam siakap, steamboat, KFC, checheongfun, satay, all these crossed my mind.
okay, he likes to stuff me with foods.so, don't blame me when suddenly i have a big eating desire.

so,
i ended up eating grilled chicken chop with black pepper sauce and kerang rebus only.because these two menu have made my small tummy full and i can barely breathe.haha

D.U uptown is one of our favourite spots for dinner.
they have lots and loads of choices of foods.
you name it,you get it.

as always,
night ride always comes after a dinner. *wink*
and as always,
i enjoy the ride so much.


semakin demdem,
nfhms.

a breath of relief

phew...
fffinaly, today i have done with my presentations and microteaching (after being postponed for several times and it was really suck waiting for everything to finish later that you're expected).

microteaching was okay.
nothing interesting because i did the post-writing stage, which is evaluation stage. SHE doesn't want any application kind of activities and that's so lame...

it has been seriously a long day.
when class started at 8.30 in the morning and ended at 9pm.
although there was quite a big gap between morning and evening class, it was still a torture.to wear the same baju kurung until 9pm.

in my previous-previous entry,
i did mention that sem 6 is really a torture.
as yes, it is indeed.like hell.

and...

today,
i've learned something new,
that it was really a heartbreaking when your bestfriend hurt you for the very first time.it was very much painful if it was to be compared when your loved one hurt you.

sometimes, it's not the action that hurts us most.
but most of the time, it's the words and the way the words being spoken.
that it is like a dagger strikes right through your heart and rips your heart out.

but what else could beat the meter of the value of friendship?
NOTHING.i repeat, NOTHING.

we're cool by now.i love you, bestfriend/s. (: *hugs*


si penyayang, ;p
nfhms.

saturdays

Once upon a time,

Saturday is the day i've always waited.
i've waited for it before.
i'm still waiting for it now.
and i will always wait for it in the future.

Saturday is the day i keep myself free.
i won't do anything related to studies.
or anything that requires me a lot of thinking.
it is the day to lazy around on the bed.

Saturday is the day to keep things organize.
i have to keep myself organize.
and arrange my stuffs so they will be organized.

Saturday is my laundry day.
and it can be a spring cleaning day.
room, kitchen, hall, and even the car.

Saturday is the day to kill my loneliness.
i will go out with my awesome friends as companions.
we will go dinner, lepaking, sharing stories, making jokes and laugh.

Saturday is the day to celebrate life.
embracing it not only with my friends but also my loved one.
'true or dare' is our game most of the time.

Since there are not so many Saturdays left...
Now..

Saturday is the day i've always waited.
for he is available only on Saturday.
most Saturdays, i will spend quality time with him.
just the two of us.him and i.
it is the day we express our love.
we snuggle in the cinema,
we feed each other dinners,
and we hold hands in the night rides.
we chill at awesome places and enjoy the music played.
we are rejoiced with smiles, laughter, hugs, and kisses.

i love Saturdays.
Saturdays make my life complete.

my Saturdays are going to be remembered all the time.


Saturday lover,
nfhms.

part 6 is a torture.

another week to go.
and i just can't wait to end this semester.
despite the fact that i have one paper for the final exam on the end of april,
i just want to stop rushing for classes in the morning.

speaking of classes,
i hate replacing classes.seriously.
with tons of assignments and other commitments,
i found replacing classes as a disturbance.
worst if it was an unplanned one.like you already planned what you're going to do at noon, suddenly in the morning you're told a replacement class is on that afternoon. =.='

practically,
we're done with a few course like Asian Literature, Methodology in Teaching Literature, and Second Language Acquisition. Though, we still have to come to class just to discuss a few things before this semester over.oh, except Asian Literature.we don't need to go to the class anymore yet there are still 3 assignments of the course need to be sent before our final paper.

that's for asian literature, and i'm not going to write about other KIV assessments for other subjects.thinking about them makes me tired,what more to talk about them.


si mengah,
nfhms.

the haunted house

i'm afraid of the dark.
i'm afraid of screams.but i love to scream.
above all, i'm afraid of the ghosts.

to satisfy and not to disappoint my besties,
i joined them to enter the haunted house that was organized on the carnival day.

hearing the howling and screaming from the inside of the house,
i was actually shaking.
but i talked so much with my friends that i ignored the shakes.

and so arrived our turn.
i grabbed pai's and fanzi's hand.i wish i could close my eyes.
i swore all the way to the exit.

i couldn't really remember how the ghosts look like (because it's dark),
but one that i really-really-really could not forget is
the white ghost, wrapped in a white cloth, its nose blocked with cotton.
and the eyes were white.
$%^&*(@#!

there was a ghost followed fanzi because fanzi laughed throughout our journey in the haunted house.but what fanzi said to that ghost was,
"jangan lah ikut saya, bang. gi kat tempat abang balik."
LOL

overall,
it was a very funny experience since i last entered a haunted house which is when i was small.thanks pai and fanzi for making me less scared. :D

with this high imagination that i have,
explains why i refuse to watch horror movies.


si penakut,
nfhms.