November 29, 2009


i was surprised.
i really am..

not really, actually.
because i kinda knew it.
but i waited.
because of so many things.

spill the beans.
you have done yours,
i don't know when will i do mine.

do i need to do for my part?
i know you can tell it yourself.

whether is it a good or a bad idea,

why do i feel much better?
why do i feel much happier?
why do i feel relieved?
why do i feel surprised? the same time

why do i feel like losing?
why do i feel like falling apart?

is it too late?
is it?
is it?

i don't know.
you tell me.

yours truly,

swimming pool! oh.swimming pool!


swimming pool..
swimming pool..

here i come!


here i am, at the Permai Villa.
oh! wait.
let us fill the tummy first.


okay.the McD's here.


it has been long since i last swimming.
splashing and drenching myself is what i used to and forever.

accompanied by two nieces and a naughty nephew,
we had a great bathe.

the pool was like an amazing beach. a blue wide ocean.
we created our own waves. we scribble our own view.
we build no sandcastle but we did platform jumping.

all i heard was laughter. laughter. and laughter.
when i dived, i saw bubbles.
some are big, some are small.

i jumped and i dived.
i swam and i drowned.
i swallowed the tasteless water.
i closed my eyes and laughed.

the rain poured down not long after that.
but i refused to climb up the pool wall.
i took a last deep dive.
i heard the rain hit the water above me.

i miss the sound of the rain.
and i miss the taste of it.
i went up to the surface
and took a deep satisfied breathe.

i was dancing the rain.
i spread my hands and looked up to the gray skies.
again, the rain hit my face.
gently streaming down through my eyes,
coming down to my nose,
and slipping into my purple lips…

it was cold and my body was shivering.
i waited for a back-warm-hug to comfort me as always.
but i felt colder and colder. i shuddered and shuddered.

not until i realized, i was alone there.
i drew my steps home as the wind blew my frosty body.

i wasn't sad. nor i felt disappointed.
but a flawless satisfaction.

it was an awesome moment, anyway.

rain lover,

p/s: the kids went up even before the rain came down. (:

November 28, 2009

our paradise.our world.


i was so delighted.
being in this paradise has never made me disappointed.
this addiction is a beautiful pain. i have always craved for more and more even if i know, it might kill me someday.
(it already did somehow)

but i don’t care. i live in it and would die in it.

the monster is in green today. he hopped in the car with his un-set hair, it was messy like edward cullen’s hair.

hey sexy. i mean, Edward Cullen (literally).
the shirtless Edward Cullen is my favourite scene. SEXY!

okay. my monster was like ogling me from his seat.
all i did was grinned. ngee~

another blank page had been doodled pleasantly.
full of colourful paints , a perfect tint.
flourished by the sunshine upon it.

it is a paradise. a beautiful one. a hard-to-resist type.
it is wonderful. it is dazzling.
always have and forever will.

monster's princess,

November 27, 2009

dear Edward Cullen

dear Edward Cullen,
please bite me.

p/s: meet me on my bed tonight.i'll be waiting.


November 25, 2009

wrapped in a monster's arms

Emotion: heart is jumping like a monkey.
Face expression: smiling ear-to-ear.
Position: lying on the bed, left-feet across the other.

It was raining. It was cold. I wish I am in the monster’s arms. But I have yet, a few miles awaited for me ahead.

There he goes. The monster is in black today.

He welcomed me with a big bear hug. I feel safe and I feel pampered. Yes, I needed the comfort.

The rain hasn’t stopped yet. Both of us are sleepyheads. We canceled our plan but we went for a ride instead.

It was all about reminiscing about his childhood memories, former schools and previous houses. What he used to do when he was a kid. What had happened when he was young. How sucky it was to wait for the bus after the school time.

We messed and dirty my car’s seats with the sweet potatoes that fell down when I fed him. The same goes for the sushi, crispy mushroom, and alien doughnuts. Milo is delicious and juicy so we tried hard not to spill out any drops of it.

The ride was fun, I couldn’t agree more. The monster and I felt so comfortable that we suddenly were praising the pleasure of sleeping. We headed home in the middle of the rain then.

A bowl of hot mushroom soup. A hug and lot of kisses.
were the next menu.

in the kitchen, i smiled. on the couch, i lay down. in my heart, i jumped.

p/s: thank you monster.

yours forever,

November 21, 2009

when the beauty turned into a beast

no more words of wisdom
no more acts of rationality
when all are words of annoyance
when actions are full of jealousy

i am a beast.

when the beauty is a saint
it creates a perfect scene.

when the saint is full of sins
a perfect scene sink.

behind you, silhouette of discontentment and envy.
because both of you and the beauty know the truth.

the beauty gets bitchy
is because of you.

beauty & the beast,


waking up and sweating, is not my favourite.
starts my day with a fear. i dislike this.

i am tired.
sick of playing with these nightmares.

i did wash my feet before i sleep.
i did pray before i close my eyes.

why did it keep haunting my nights?
oh, stop disturbing my beauty sleep.


i am tired.
have some mercy please..


November 20, 2009

hypocrisy, yes.

no matter how we reject society
or how fucked up we are
or how we thought it's individual right
we live in the society
and most probably would die in it.

reject as you might say
say to hell with living up to expectations
but in the end,
we realize we can't live alone.

you might throw everything away
and never give fuck to society expectations
if can, prove you can live alone.

it's a hypocrisy, yes.


it's also a glove that protects humans from
becoming beings lower than animals.

up and hating it

it is 4 in the morning.

i am up.
i am hating it. =.='

hush hush eyes..
go back to sleep, will you?


yours truly,

November 19, 2009

..and i was safe in your love.

how sweet!

loves first kisses.hush...

the lingering caresses of two hearts
unwilling to break the spell of ages.

you came to me.
bourne on the breath of hope.
...and i was safe in your love.

i feel you.
in my blood, in my bones.
your heart beats out the rhythm of my joy.
an intricate and intoxicating dance.


the end is, it already happened.
oh no!

fear not,my love.

for even the darkest hour,



...and i was safe in your love.