of fara.sara.laila.

*giggling*

define identity.
it covers names, appearance, and... _____. *complete yourself*

okay.
most people call me fara.
obviously,that's my name. my actual name.
name as written in my birth certificate, identity card, and license.

as fara,
i have my own style of being myself.
my own dress codes.
my own way of talking; talking to ladies and gentlemen.
my own way of walking.
bla..bla..bla..

people change.things revolve.

i remembered of a time.
a time when i got a new name; sara.
this happened last year.
my friends and i went clubbing on one night.a wild night,i should say.
spotted at one corner, sat 3 Londoners.
well,
the conversation began:

him: hey.you alone?
me: no.there (pointing my finger to my companions) my friends.
him: where are you from?
me: here.sabah. (avoiding long explanation) you?
him: london.

*awkward silence and out-of-tempo dance*

me: what's your name?
him: grace.
me: *thinking* isn't that name suits better for a girl?
him: you?
me: fara.
him: what?
me: fara.
him: pardon?
me: fara.
him:sara?
me: *nodding* yeah...sara. =.='
..not planning to teach him phonetics in a club..

enough about sara.
let's move on to Laila.

this is funny.
i got this name just recently.last week,to be exact.

Laila is a main character in the movie 'Niyang Rapik' who is actually dead.Feeling annoying for she keeps repeating the same line
"kenapa abang tinggalkan Laila?" in that movie, i did the same to my friends; male friends. it's kinda scary to that. it is as if i was talking sincerely from my heart.. LOL

and the next morning i went to a module.
hating it, i was playful enough on that day.i introduced my name as Laila during the ice breaking session.
and now, the new people i know during the module called me Laila. =.='

i am here.
as fara.sara.laila.

whatever you may call,
i am me.
with the same style of being myself.
the manje one.the perasan one.
the fragile one.the little crazy one.


the attractive one? ;p *hmm*,
nfhms.

natural sauna

sauna.sauna.sauna.sauna.
sauna.sauna.sauna.
sauna.sauna.

mmm..repeating it for several times,
i feel like laughing.

i love sauna.seriously.
because...

sauna benefits us in many ways.
especially for our health.
says asthma, bronchitis, joints pain, and yadda.yadda.yadda.
it helps reducing all the bad bacterias/viruses/elements
and providing us some relief.

i have one at my house.
everytime i use it for 15minutes, i lose 1kg.
yeah...that's the actual reason why i love it. ^_^

well,
sah halam (cuter when i pronounced it this way kan? kan?) is a natural sauna.

but i dislike it.
indeed, i hate it.

i don't like going to the class with wet armpits. *jatuh saham! ;p*
sweats stream all over the body.
from the forehead to the neck down to the cleavage.
from the hips to the between two legs down to the knees.
it makes me really uncomfortable and i feel like taking off my clothes...

all of my friends have been complaining about this hotness they face day and nights.
despite agreeing to the hotness during daytime,i disagreed about the nights for i always feel chill during my sleep.

but last night,
the hotness had proved me wrong.i was sweating like hell.sweating like while you're having sex,you know.i can't take it anymore
and ended up sleeping on the floor...=.='


p/s:

this weather is killing me.
anyway,
in Finland, sauna is a place for a woman to give birth. O.O




si tak suke sah halam,
nfhms.

module review : FEB 27th

Laila: Kenapa abang tinggalkan Laila?

Niyang Rapik was not that bad.
Overall, it was ok. I thought it was as scary as any other horror movie that involves ghost and whatsoever. I rather said it was a sad story. In a way, it reminds me of a chapter in my life.

Okay. I had to attend a module the next morning. But there I was, still lepaking at BunD at 3 a.m. Lazing and wasting time can be too good to be ended fast. =.=’

Despite lack of sleep, panda eyes, back aching, tiredness,
I pushed myself not to skip the module.
And so these are some pictures of me during the module.




time: 9.00 a.m
mode: oh fucking sleepy





time: 9.++ a.m
mode: camwhoring




time: during the speech (10.00 a.m, i guess)
mode: placing to sleep...look where i am.




time: afternoon
mode: sakit hati sebab panas sangat!




time: almost 2.00 p.m
mode: nak chrysanthemum tea lagi.
hero: hazwan.thanks for giving me one.love you sayang!



time: 4.00 p.m
mode: @$#%$&^ bila nak habes ni?! >.<


si tak suke pegi module,
nfhms.

lupa diri

my back is aching.
all my joints are in pain.
can someone lessen my ouchies?

i sleep less.
i eat a lot.
i lack of rest.i need a good one.

itula,
enjoy saje.
pantang holidays, mulalah mengorak langkah.
ke sana ke mari.
dari utara ke selatan.
timur ke barat. tipu sangat.

asal hari isnin je,
mula sakit sini sana.

sampai assignments pon kau lupa?


yours truly,
lailadollar.

LOL

melatah

at first, i agreed to his request.
sebab aku blur dia called tiba-tiba.

*excited pon ade jugak* LOL
aku ingatkan pasal apalah kan.
suka betul kau men-spoil-kan mood aku. kan?
nak jugak suruh dia buat apa kau nak.

berbalik kepada jalan yang benar:
tapi lepas tu,
aku berfikir.
kenapa perlu aku buat apa yang dia suruh?
kenapa aku kena buat ini untuk korang?
kenapa kau pasti sangat itu dia? *kesian...she doesn't trust you.*

tak cukup ke semua yang aku dah korbankan?
you already took everything away from me. tak cukup?
aku pon dah jadi gila. tak cukup?
aku tak kacau kau. tak cukup?

anonymous can be anyone.
aku pun tak pasti siapa dia.
it can be a ‘he’ or a ‘she’
it can be myself or my admirer
it can be him or him or another him
it can be someone that i don’t know
it can be yiya.housemate aku tu gila sikit! tak, dia gila banyak.

coincidence happens.
don’t feel too insecure.not at the wrong place.wrong time.wrong person. enough doubt.
it doesn't bring any good.

kau kenapa?

ini blog aku.
sila jangan baca kalau rasa sakit hati.

tengok macam aku.
aku tak baca blog kau.
sebab aku tahu, kalau aku baca aku akan sakit hati.

aku bijak.
tapi kau, tidak.


p/s:

i don’t think i will delete that comment.
that's my right. kau sakit hati, sakit hati sorang-sorang.

kau terasa?
sepuluh jari aku susun.
ampun maaf aku pohon.


thank you.