It has been 12 days since the last goodbye.
Time goes on but I don’t. I need change but not bring myself to accept one. Agreed with a friend of mine; it is like the process of deleting a habit. but I must try.
I have to face this abrupt loss, after all. Deal with it, cope with it, and live with it.
When people ask or say;
“How are you?”
“Are you okay?”
“Be strong!”
“I’m fine, thank you.” (nodding)
“I’m okay.” (nodding)
“…” (smiling and nodding)
are my answers. Maybe I literally mean it. Maybe I don’t.
I can’t tell how I feel. I can’t tell what I am thinking of. I don’t know what I do. I don’t know where I am heading to.
Yes. I am lost. Lost at thinking perhaps?
I know there are 2 ways of coping up with this.
First, delete all pictures, phone numbers, bittersweet memories, cut the connections, forget everything, be a stranger and move on; in which good for me and this is what many 'broken-hearts' try to do.
or...
keep everything, smiles in each encounter, remember everything, take everything with you and move on; in which way much better but harder to be done.
hurm… *thinking*
I’ll go for the second one. I’ll work on it.
Chapter is closed. I am moving on, and who’s coming with me?
yours truly,
nfhms.
7 comments:
Propa betul..
Tanya lg who's coming with you..
Of kos Pai and I are always available..
Take care Fawa.. B strong.. =)
ape propa2 ni..
yeah i know..both of u always be by my side.always pamper and comfort me.always treat me like a baby girl.sometimes, like a girlfriend.always manjekan me (which i like most ;p)
thanks so much.later, i'll write something for both of u.okie?
love u both.
lots and loads.xoxo
b strong.. Allah always wif u.
Twelve days and it felt so long, right? Really, it's easy to keep that pokerface. I myself was so good at it that nobody knows how I really felt, for about six months maybe? Nobody knew what I really felt inside. Most people aren't psychic. But as time passed by, I recovered and stood back up on my own. Not because of anyone. No rebounds. No drugs no drinking. That, I came to conclusion that no one could help you but yourself. But keep in mind, the path is winding. Who knows if it's easy or not? Nevertheless, don't do it halfway.
Your last question, meh, you don't even have to ask. Silly you.
chayo girl! u can always do this...
see..u have ppl to be by your side...
though i think ive said this lotsa times before, time will help u heal but u must be acceptance & patience. If u feel, ppl cant ease what u feel, remember that Allah is always there for us..always..;)
need anything, just inform me ok..i told u once and i'm telling u again. take k and eat nasi for heaven's sake!
-van-
v: say no to rice..haha
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